“Being a sex symbol is a heavy load to carry, especially when one is tired, hurt, and bewildered.” -Marilyn Monroe
There are so many challenges thrown at girls and young women today, such as going to the best parties, experimenting with drugs and alcohol, looking like Megan Fox, and still somehow keep aiming for their goals. Sometimes, the modern girl puts education, career, and other responsibilities on the back-burner. She wants to be everywhere at once and do everything. At the end of the day though, no matter what is going on in her life, the modern girl wants to be loved. By an attractive guy. With a car. A job. An education (or in pursuit of one). But, most importantly, a guy with all these things who still has time and energy to spend on her.
This is constantly becoming a problem for a decent looking young girl who is working hard towards her goals. For some reason, it’s easy for her to fall into the arms of… well about anyone. She is willing to settle for a guy who may disrespect her, put off spending time with her, never wants to do anything recreational (date wise), and who may be after just one Thing. A loving relationship is usually her goal, but whether or not some girls today even know what that is… is speculated on. Because as long as a guy is willing to kiss her, hold her, and tell her she is beautiful, her heart is encased by him. As much as we want to believe that today’s young women are strong, independent, Madonna types, it is proven over and over again that many are in fact clueless, fragile, and overly sensitive. Don’t get me wrong, I am pleased to say that many of my friends have found very good guys that they have been with for a long time. But it is rare… too far and few between.
So here is the question of the day: How can the modern girl overcome her thirst for love and admiration in order to look for other things in a man such as strength, courage, and loyalty?
Here are some tricks I have seen modern girls use/have used myself:
1. Get Pregnant by him. Believe it or not! Some young girls feel that if they get pregnant with a man’s child, he will be obligated to stay with her and create a life with her. Does this work? In some cases, yes. But many times, no. The man would rather pay child support and keep going around with other girls than stay with her and make a family. Let’s just say. This method is a FAILURE!
2. The “holding out” method. A girl meets a guy and is interested in pursuing a relationship. For a designated period of time, such as 2 weeks, 6 months, 3 dates or more, she will not give him sex and will set certain physical boundaries. The idea is that if a guy is willing to stay with you, date you, and be your boyfriend with no intercourse, he cares about you way more than just sexually.
Does this work? Maybe if she does it right. For one, NEVER give into any urges when trying to hold out. Also, do NOT inform him of how long or how many dates. Because then, he will go till that date, expect sex, and then you feel that you have no option but to give up the chastity belt even if you still aren’t sure about him. Sometimes it works out well. It has for two of my friends who have been with their menfolk for years now. And sometimes, it turns out that when you hold out on him all he does is try to push the boundaries and still never takes you on a date or even introduces you to his friends. In this method, realize the potential for failure is evident.
3. An open relationship. Begin with an open relationship or be “friends with benefits”. Then, as time goes on suggest that you actually pursue a relationship together since you already are together in a way. The idea is that by building a physical relationship, a mental attachment will arise. This may work. Let’s say he says yes after the question is posed. Just realize that usually the nature of your relationship will probably not change. You two will still do basically the same thing, the only difference being that you officially claimed that you two were in a relationship. This method usually begins and ends in a physical relationship only… from personal experiece.
4. The “Just Friends” method. When the modern girl begins a romantic relationship by simply being friends and eventually if you have a mutual chemistry, transform the relationship. The idea is that you both begin your relationship as normal people being friends, not man versus woman. You grow a friendship and get to know each other in many different ways, mentally. Eventually you both decide that you either care about each other and want to date romantically or that you just want to stay friends. He may try something romantic with you in your friendship but politely turn him down if you feel the timing is not right. Also consider his advance as a factor in deciding whether he would be a good, caring boyfriend versus a good, true friend. Does it work? Results may vary. But, this method has incomes that can be way more positive than the other methods.
Yes, we modern girls have many tricks up our sleeves. After all, a romantic relationship is very important to us. However, ladies, no matter what trials and tribulations come our way, we still need to focus on the most important lesson learned from the affairs of our hearts: Aim for the sky. Strive to be the best we can be when it comes to our education, career, family, accomplishing our goals, and learning to love ourselves without the approval of others. When you can do that, then you can decide who appreciates you and loves you the way you deserve. This, above all, is the best method.
Your Modern Girl,
C
moderngirlsmind 